Caesars Entertainment in Town to Give Us a Taste of Casino Employment Opportunities

State House News Service is reporting that Caesars Entertainment and Suffolk Downs are jointly hosting an employment forum on Thursday (10/3) “to give local residents a taste of the employment opportunities that await them if the bid to build a casino is successful” — and, just possibly to influence their vote in the November 5th referendum that will determine whether the casino moves forward.

Since I will not be able to attend the forum, I spent some time on Caesars employment website to find out what jobs in a modern casino are like. Of course, everybody knows that modern casinos no longer involve games of baccarat played on plush furniture by rich and exotic people who use cigarette holders. They involve slot machines — in fact, modern casinos are barns packed full of slot machines. Modern slot machines are sophisticated computers designed to extract as much money from players as possible, and the biggest players are people of low and moderate income.

So it may not be a surprise that among the employment opportunities that await the people of East Boston and Revere if the bid to build a casino is successful are jobs like “slots foreperson.” This job involves keeping slots players happy during the hours they spend losing their money and keeping their mind off how much they’re losing. Or, as perhaps only Caesars could describe it:

Slots Foreperson: Actively patrols assigned sections looking for opportunities to surprise and delight guests. Enhances guest’s slot entertainment experience by creating a fun, high-energy environment through the celebration of slot wins and building players’ perception of luck. Displays attentive, upbeat, and enthusiastic behavior throughout the shift. Develops customer loyalty by delivering unparalleled guest interactions as directed by company trained initiatives.

If you’re the kind of person who looks forward every day to “building players’ perception of luck,” which apparently means explaining why it’s not totally a bad thing that the rent money is all gone, this is a job you might want to look into.

(And if anybody finds out what Caesars means by “unparalleled guest interactions,” please write. I am imagining the worst.)